Privacy Policy

Last Updated: Whenever Our Toes Felt Like It

Welcome to "Smell These Feeties", a digital establishment dedicated to the refined appreciation of feet-related visual content. By existing in the general proximity of this website, you acknowledge and agree that this Privacy Policy—written with unnecessarily large vocabulary and an alarming level of confidence—governs your use.

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1. Information We Collect (With Great Restraint and Mild Judgment)

We collect only what is reasonably necessary for the site to function, which may include:

1.1. Information You Voluntarily Provide

Your email address, should you choose to bless us with it.
Any messages or inquiries sent through our contact form.
Your payment details, collected securely by our trusted third-party payment processor (we never see your card numbers—we barely trust ourselves with our own finances).

1.2. Information Automatically Collected Our website, like most functioning websites not powered by three raccoons in a trench coat, may automatically gather:

Your IP address (not your home address—we aren’t that creepy).
Browser type, device type, and other standard metadata.
General usage logs so we can see which pages people enjoy and which pages people flee from immediately.

We do not collect biometric toe data, the smell of your socks, or anything that requires a court order or a psychic.

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2. How We Use Your Information (Semi-Responsibly)

We may use your information to:

Deliver the digital content you kindly paid for.
Improve the site and ensure it loads faster than your tolerance for slow websites.
Send optional emails that you can unsubscribe from at any moment—no guilt trips included.
Maintain security measures that ensure your data remains safer than a toe in a steel-toed boot. We do not sell your data. We do not rent your data. We do not trade your data for magic beans, toe rings, or even limited-edition socks.

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3. Cookies (The Website Kind, Not the Edible Kind)

We may use cookies to remember your preferences, improve your experience, and reduce the number of times you see the same pop-up explaining that we use cookies. You may decline cookies, but the site may then behave unpredictably—much like a foot cramp at 3 a.m.

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4. Third-Party Services (The Necessary Evils)

We rely on reputable third-party services for:

Payment processing
Website analytics
Hosting and security

These parties only receive the minimum data required to do their job, and they are forbidden—by contract and morality—from using it for anything else.

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5. Children’s Privacy (Absolutely Not)

This site is strictly for adults. We do not knowingly collect data from anyone under 18. If a minor attempts to access this site, they will be escorted off the premises by digital security guards wearing steel boots.

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6. Data Security (The Serious Part)

We apply industry-standard security practices to protect your information, including encryption, restricted access, and regularly updating our digital guard dogs. While no system is 100% impenetrable, we do treat your data like our own toes—handled with care and never left unprotected.

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7. Your Rights (You’re Powerful, Bestie)

Depending on where you live, you may have certain rights such as:

Requesting access to your data
Requesting deletion of your data
Correcting inaccurate information
Complaining directly to us when technology misbehaves

We respect all valid requests and will respond promptly—likely with a polite email and zero attitude.

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8. Policy Changes (Because Life Happens)

We may update this Privacy Policy occasionally. If changes are significant, we will notify you in a reasonable manner—likely via email or an elegantly dramatic announcement bar at the top of the site.

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9. Contact Us (We Don’t Bite)

Conclusion By continuing to use Smell These Feeties, you acknowledge that this Privacy Policy is both unnecessarily dramatic and surprisingly thorough. Thank you for being here. We appreciate you—and your impeccable taste in niche websites.